I came upon an article “Have You Tried the Six Varieties of Love?” by Roman Krznaric. He is the co-founder of School of Life in London and mentioned ancient Greece (feeding my art-travel fantasies) so I read on. 

Pompe, Eros and Dionysos Greek, 4th century BCE, Metropolitan Museum

Krznaric starts with Eros, "named after the Greek god of fertility representing sexual passion and desire." Shakespeare, Austen and Hollywood have already explored eros extensively.

Philautia is self-love. A great idea though sometimes difficult. If recent events have taught us anything, you can be a good person with a pure heart (Dr. Fauci) and someone will criticize you. Philautia might be to listen to Taylor Swift and just shake it off.

Krznaric describes Ludus as “the Greek’s idea of playful love, which referred to the playful affection between children or young lovers…we also live out our ludus when we sit around in a bar bantering and laughing with friends, or when we go out dancing.” Lots of fun. Not happening these days. Or for a while…


One type of love that is happening these days is Pragma or mature love. “This was the deep understanding that developed between long-married couples. It was about making compromises to help the relationship work over time, and showing patience and tolerance.” My parents have been married over 50 years and haven’t seen anyone but each other since March. They are perfectly happy.

The remaining two types of love are invaluable, but sometimes overlooked.

"Philia or friendship was about showing loyalty to your friends, sacrificing for them, as well as sharing your emotions with them.“ I don’t know if it is aging or tough times, but my friendships have become a lifeline. It is a deep, unexpected bond formed out of simple love rather than obligation.

The last ancient Greek love relates to you right now.
“Perhaps the most radical was Agape or selfless love. This was a love that you extended to all people, whether family members or distant strangers.” 
You are helping a group of women you have never met.
You buy my jewelry for loved ones or yourself (philautia!) supporting the Her Future jewelry program. You have made it possible to start our sponsorship program. You donate. You take the time to read these emails with the girls are in your hearts.
That is selfless love.
I am so grateful. 

Photos of Her Future Coalition by @sarahannayphotography

Leave a comment