A friend asked me to write a style guide showing how to wear my jewelry - outfits, occasions, looks, etc. It’s a great, fun idea, but every time I sit down to start it, I’m halted by a nagging sense that something is not right. 
As we emerge from behind our doors and screens, it’s worse.  In conversations about jewelry and fashion, the majority of women I speak with immediately start to criticize themselves. They don’t think they “look good” or aren’t sure how to “look right”. After our forced confinement, natural self-soothing with food, and extended period of extreme stress, we look different than we did before and from what I hear, no one is happy about it.
I cannot with a good conscience or pure heart create a style guide if the goal is to “look better”. Why do we want to look better?
The system that offers us the ease of our modern American lives is commercialism that survives on creating a need and then selling something to fulfill it. There is a damaging side effect of the work harder, be better culture. The message is this: 
You aren’t good enough.
You are too thin.
sexist ad are you too thin
And too fat.
you are too fat
Parts of your body are too small.
sexist ad men love fannies
And too big.
sexist ad pear shaped women
Your skin is too light.
skin tanning ad
And too dark.
skin lightening ad vintage

You might be thinking, 'Wow, those are some crazy, olde tyme ads! Society used to suck! I’m so glad things are different now!'


body shaming ad


Get the perfect body


 skin tanning oprah magazine


skin lighteners amazon

And the audience for the following is currently in charge of corporations and the US government.

sexism vintage

Our economy and society are predicated on our feeling like shit. 

No one is going to change it for us. People are getting too much money and power from it. And they will hold onto this structure with every ounce of energy in their shaking, choking fists.

So for all of us who criticize ourselves: If we want to look good, we have to tell ourselves right now that we look good. No matter how much we weigh, whatever shape we are, with whatever-colored skin. 

We look good. We’re definitely good enough. Right now.

 We'll get to style later.

Tell me your thoughts. Share. To be continued.

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